We live in one of the busiest cities in the world. Life moves at full speed. Immediacy is the rule of the day. Information flies, we have to run to the subway so we’re not late, we have to leave earlier in case the subway is delayed. We can’t be late. It’s already late. Run. Move. Eat, we have to go. Get dressed, we have to go. Hurry up, let’s go.

Adult life in New York sounds a lot like this. But have we stopped to realize that we’re imposing this same rhythm on our children’s development? For example: can you let your child decide what to play with without intervening? Do you give them the space to explore? Are we aware that development happens without rush?

Children’s natural rhythms—especially babies and toddlers from 0 to 2 years old—often conflict with adult life. Adults are focused on producing and seeing results; children’s rhythms are centered on process and exploration. A child’s rhythm is slower. It focuses on getting to know their body, their limits, their movements. They are interested in exploring and discovering the world. They are constantly recognizing what surrounds them and how it surrounds them.

The adult rhythm frequently interrupts any movement or activity; the child’s rhythm does not. It allows continuity and repetition because the child is focused on getting to know themselves, everything around them, and letting their body be ready to keep growing.

The adult rhythm is obsessed with the urgency of teaching. I’ve often heard family members worry because a child doesn’t know their vowels—when the child is only two years old. But at the same time that adults have this obsession with teaching children, the same sense of urgency leads them to feed kids screen time, overstimulating their rhythm.

Simply put: our children’s time is not adult time. Good caregiving practices that protect childhood development embrace slow parenting.

Let’s observe before we intervene. Raising children without rushing supports development in which children feel more secure and autonomous; where adults build more empathetic bonds and experience less frustration in everyday parenting.

Raise children without rushing. Yes, in New York. Anywhere.